ignorance is bliss

These were two of my first rolls of film ever, taken from mid-October to early November of 2021. It was because of these rolls that I truly fell in love with the way film renders colour and movement, and became infatuated with the rose-tinted glasses that Ultramax 400 filtered my life through—a colour palatte I have been fruitlessly chasing after ever since.

After all this time, if you were to ask me what late fall/early winter is to me, I will always circle back to these two rolls of film to show you what it feels like. It’s shivering to your bones even under layers and layers of clothing, it’s all the time in the world with the people you love—hesitant to think about a future where you can no longer spare the time for each other, it’s new beginnings and closed chapters, it’s laughter-filled nights out, it’s the frigid air under my shirt and the wind in my hair.

This roll exemplifies the beauty of my vivid youth, and the tragedy of what was inevitably to come—the loss of it all. But Amory Blaine once said, “I don't want to repeat my innocence. I want the pleasure of losing it again”, and if this was what he is referring to, I can’t tell you that he’s right enough.